why it should be like this???

it was so hard when u want to say dat u ar really2 in love with her,i tried to do it for many times,but she still didnt get what iz the true meaning dat im trying to tell her...it was so hard when im always fighting with her..there is always a thing dat will disturb our relationship,,and it was sucks..it jus make me so miserable...and tonight it happen again,i juz want to protect her from being cheated again by those jerks...i know and i really know who and what are those jerks..i just dont want her to have any relationship with them,just because i dont like it so much..why i didnt like it??to be honest,i just still didnt believe her when she told me dat she doesnt have any feeling or relationship with her ex...i still didnt believe it since at 1st she ever told me about her true feeling dat she still love her ex ,and diz happen since last year(2008),on dat time she sometimes do chatting,messaging,even calling with her ex...i know she doin dat,i just told her dat i didnt like it n i didnt want it to be happen again,then she said,okay i wont do dat ever again,she also had make a promise 2 me,but it was not just like that,because it happen again n again..she always say sorry to me when i got her doin it again,and i just say itz okay,but dun ever do it anymore k,then she make another promise 2 me dat she wont do it again,until 1 day,i,again got her broke her promise again.i just realize it when i tried to call her at night and it was our promiz dat we'll have a phone date at dat time but it always i cant reach her when i try 2 call her,i tried 4 many times,but it was still the same,she juz replied my massage just about half an hour after dat,,she just say sorry to me 4 cant answer my call because she was calling with another person at that time,then i start asking her,who is in call with her at that time,she tried not to tell me who is dat person,but i keep on asking till she juz tell me that she was in call with her ex...i was so sad on that time,it broke my heart so much,what would u feel when u do have made a promise with ur gf to have a phone date on dat night but it didnt happen,i just want to hear her voice on that night,bcoz it is not always i can meet her,i just want to hear her voice,and i just wanna let my feeling with her...but what i got??she only broked my heart..i was so sad at that time.....since after it had happen,i always have a feeling that she still have a feeling with her ex.....that is why i didnt ever like when she always have any relation with her ex and even her ex fren,i just didnt want it,because it just make me so hard 2 trust her again,and i always become not on mood when i know she did it..i know,i just hurt her feeling when i suddenly become not in mood and i even hurt more worst than her when she do that...i just wanna she to be understand about diz.......i hate diz feeling...