it was so hard when u want to say dat u ar really2 in love with her,i tried to do it for many times,but she still didnt get what iz the true meaning dat im trying to tell her...it was so hard when im always fighting with her..there is always a thing dat will disturb our relationship,,and it was sucks..it jus make me so miserable...and tonight it happen again,i juz want to protect her from being cheated again by those jerks...i know and i really know who and what are those jerks..i just dont want her to have any relationship with them,just because i dont like it so much..why i didnt like it??to be honest,i just still didnt believe her when she told me dat she doesnt have any feeling or relationship with her ex...i still didnt believe it since at 1st she ever told me about her true feeling dat she still love her ex ,and diz happen since last year(2008),on dat time she sometimes do chatting,messaging,even calling with her ex...i know she doin dat,i just told her dat i didnt like it n i didnt want it to be happen again,then she said,okay i wont do dat ever again,she also had make a promise 2 me,but it was not just like that,because it happen again n again..she always say sorry to me when i got her doin it again,and i just say itz okay,but dun ever do it anymore k,then she make another promise 2 me dat she wont do it again,until 1 day,i,again got her broke her promise again.i just realize it when i tried to call her at night and it was our promiz dat we'll have a phone date at dat time but it always i cant reach her when i try 2 call her,i tried 4 many times,but it was still the same,she juz replied my massage just about half an hour after dat,,she just say sorry to me 4 cant answer my call because she was calling with another person at that time,then i start asking her,who is in call with her at that time,she tried not to tell me who is dat person,but i keep on asking till she juz tell me that she was in call with her ex...i was so sad on that time,it broke my heart so much,what would u feel when u do have made a promise with ur gf to have a phone date on dat night but it didnt happen,i just want to hear her voice on that night,bcoz it is not always i can meet her,i just want to hear her voice,and i just wanna let my feeling with her...but what i got??she only broked my heart..i was so sad at that time.....since after it had happen,i always have a feeling that she still have a feeling with her ex.....that is why i didnt ever like when she always have any relation with her ex and even her ex fren,i just didnt want it,because it just make me so hard 2 trust her again,and i always become not on mood when i know she did it..i know,i just hurt her feeling when i suddenly become not in mood and i even hurt more worst than her when she do that...i just wanna she to be understand about diz.......i hate diz feeling...
i dont know what i should write now...i juz want 2 express my feeling rite now...im not so sure with what im feeling rite now...but itz really irritate me,and i totally doesnt like it,itz about my love...yeah it iz...for make it clear,itz about my relationship with my girl....hmm..i do love her,really2 love her so much,she is my only 1,and the only girl that i want,,i know dat she was the girl and she is 4 me.....hmmm..i start to know that i ws really in love with her when she juz accidently talk about her ex boyfriend..and i know she really love her ex boyfren ****,i know itz hard 4 someone to 4get her/his first love,because it was the first ever beautiful thing happen 2 us..but itz okay for now,bcause she didnt love him anymore,as what she had told me before,and i believe her...but thats not what i want 2 talk about,i juz want her to know how i love her so much,she is the girl who make me really falling in love,into her,i ever told her before since few month after we get into this relationship..i told her that i was never ever feel falling in love with a girl,really2 fall in love with a girl as what she make me into her...itz so beautiful when im really falling in love with her,she totally made me crazy with her,lolz...im totally in love with her,she make me 2 forget about another girl,i mean she make me lost my interest with another girl except her...i was really suprised when i realize about that lolz....you know what,i totally lost my interest to another girl,im only totally interested with her..i juz want 2 be with her,always be with her...this is wierd huh..lolz..it because,before she made me falling in love with her..i was a playboy,and i admitted it,i'v ever have girlfriend which is more than 4,,lolz,,,i dont know why i did that lolz..i think that because i still doesnt feel any love with them,maybe it was just 4 fun with them...when a girl ask me,do you have a girlfriend?..then i'll tell them that im still single and having no relationship with any girl,but in fact..i do have more than 1 girl on yhat tym lolz...then when the girl ask me to couple with her,i just accept her lolz....but it iz totally different now,,she have change me a lot,even now,a girl asked me if i do have a girlfriend,and i proudly tell her,yes i have and i really love my girlfriend so much...then after that the girl contact me less from before as everytime as she done before lolz..but i was happy with that,i was happy because i have someone that i love so much,.and me only belong 2 her lolz...hmm i think itz enough 4 today,im starting to be tired now lolz...but dont worry,i'll continue my story next tym..when i got free time haha.. TO BE CONTINUED...
